Once there was nothing except Brian. Now, when your floating around in nothing,
it gets pretty boring so Brian decided to blow stuff up.
This is what we call the big explosion.
Even though stuff was blowing up, Brian thought it was a little too dark. So he decided
to turn on the lights. Using his infinite power, he found a lightbulb and turned it on.
This was the sun.
If thou looks up on a dark night, you’ll see other stars. They aren’t actual stars though.
Brian didn’t want to turn all the lightbulbs on so he casted greater illusion to create the stars.
Brian was feeling a bit lonely. After all he had a universe but no people in the universe to brag to.
He stood on the Earth (A bland husk of a planet) and said. “I cast create water at 9th level.” After expending
his spell slot, the waters rose. He took a dip in the ocean and while he enjoyed it, upon coming up for air he
realized he forgot to add said air. He didn’t have a way to make air so he decided to add some fish while
he figured it out. Though he was glad to have them, fish are dumb and he couldn’t hold a conversation for long.
A handful of million billion years later, Brian got bored again and created the atmosphere. Then the fish
conveniently begun growing feet. But fish with feet are ugly so Brian transmuted them into dinosaurs
because he likes dinosaurs.
These dinosaurs were pretty cool for a while but they were dumb like fish so Brian decided to kill them all.
He called down a meteor, courtesy of the united states of american dinos, to kill them. As the meteor descended,
a small figure was seen riding the meteor down like a frickin’ cowboy, eating some little ham out of a
little can. The heat of the meteor gave him a little tan. And who was this deity? It was Dan The Little Man.